18 Reasons An Investor Will Run From a Startup

Please God help me! Don’t let me see any more startups asking for funding before they have the most rudimentary startup aspects covered every which way to Sunday. You think I’m joking?

Imagine starting a pitch about the market size by saying, ”There are four billion people in the world with computers and each of them will need our software.” I swear, I have heard that numerous times.

Have you heard the Shark Tank guys glare at the pitchers and ask what planet they came from? I had to make a list because some startup “founders” seem like they should belong on alien planets. There are key points said, implied or shown that will drive VCs to quickly close their briefcases and leave the boardroom. They are, in no order of daftness:

• The evaluation was determined on a roulette wheel just before the meeting. I realize that a young founder faced with possible investors may be inclined to see a red sports car or a fancy new office in their future but asking for a 30x valuation on a retail startup is absurd — please plug in your own crazy valuation stories here, we’ve all heard them!
• They still have full time jobs. Come on people! Entrepreneurs risk everything for the sake of the startup. This is unacceptable. Take the risk like the rest of us and prove your passion for your startup.